Unlearning to Learn
“Unlearning to Learn”
Psalm 119:33-40 Romans 13:8-14
Fourteenth Sunday after Pentecost, Proper 18, Year A, September 6, 2020
First Presbyterian Church, Sandpoint, Idaho
Andy Kennaly, Pastor
Authors have a way of inspiring people, by the way they phrase things, by putting words to complex situations or feelings, in helping us connect with characters as people come alive through the written word, or maybe in sharing their own views on life in ways that resonate with us at key points in our own journey. One writer who’s inspired me is Anne Lamott.
When the House of Hope Presbyterian Church in St. Paul, Minnesota had a Celebration of Faith and Writing event in October, 2009, I made sure to get a front row seat for Anne Lamott’s keynote presentation. I’d spent that day in various workshops, listening to local authors giving helpful presentations on insights they wanted to share. But in the evening the House was packed as internationally recognized Anne Lamott came in from the airport to share with hundreds of eager, inspiring authors and appreciative readers.
As she was introduced and took the spotlight, she had a humility about her as she gently encouraged the inspiring writers in that sanctuary space. I took notes, jotted down things like:
- You have to make mistakes to find out who you aren’t
- You grow into who you are
- Courage is fear that’s said its prayers
She shared how one of the best parts of writing, is that it helps you grow up. Engage in writing as a creative act, she suggests, for example, to “deal with fugitive anger…this brings life…a great dilemma parallels great growth.” She says, “Writing is a walk of faith away from the complete obsession of ourselves, which is usually either expressed as doubt or as being self-inflated. Writing is being where you are assigned to be. It’s in showing up, and it’s OK to not know.”
Her Rule # 1 is to Start Where You Are. It’s like driving at night with the headlights on. You see just a little bit ahead of you, but eventually you make the whole journey. It takes courage to do this. Rule # 2 is to Slow Down. Stop. No multi-tasking. She told us that “Every day I decide on one thing I’m not going to do.” She says the blessing of when your lost, you can stay certain that God is rejoicing that you’re paying attention. She also says, “Waste more time, stare into space, space out; that’s when something hits you, like ‘What if…’ But she gives fair warning that “stillness and sadness are hard to take. You need to meditate, learn to quiet your mind. Stillness and silence is where we find transitions, metaphor. But in order for that to happen, she says, “We have to unlearn most of what we’ve been taught.” This helps us heal, from perfectionism, failures, messes, mistakes.
Her Rule # 3 is to Ask Questions. Have someone read your stuff and critique it honestly, gently. Willingness to change comes from pain.
Her talk was filled with encouragement, lots of stories about her life, both the mistakes and the successes. The entire room laughed with her, most people were taking notes like I was, and she had our full attention and instant credibility. She reminded us that early writing has a need to be taken seriously, but as we get older, who cares?! The respect for you is not out there for you. What is ‘out there’ is not what helps or heals.
Near the end of her talk she gave the writers the nuggets we already knew but needed to hear her tell us, which she did in her own hard-won words of experience: “Make it a habit to write. Keep the discipline regardless of your mood. Faith and writing are similar because we do them both in the dark. You don’t know where you’re going. Always carry a pen! Show up. Be willing to be miserable. God is with you in the mess, the hurt. Breathe. Little by little you’ll come through. God loves you beyond all imagining just the way you are. You want the illumination. That’s why you choose the work.”
Her insights were shared in the fall of 2009 and I’ve been living that mix of fulfilling and resisting them ever since. Maybe I wasn’t ready to receive them in their fullness at the time, but now my life has more perspective as I receive, once again, this inspiration. I’m glad I sat in the front row. I’m glad I took notes. I’m glad God loves us in the fullness of a community held in mystery as time and space blur and that thin place of Anne Lamott’s keynote address continues to resonate as discipline for the craft of writing builds and grows stronger day by day.
Thank you, Anne! Thanks for showing up! Thanks for reminding us to pay attention. I’m very glad to have heard you speak in person so many years ago. Enjoy the night driving! I have my pen, always.
In a similar way as I share my sentiments regarding a writer’s workshop so many years ago, this morning’s scriptures have a similar feel to them, a parallel resonance. Like the Apostle Paul writing the early church in Rome, sharing wisdom hard-won in his life, opening his heart, saying, “Owe no one anything, except to love one another, for the one who loves another has fulfilled the law. The commandments […] are summed up in this word, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ Love does no wrong to a neighbor; therefore, love is the fulfillment of the law.”
Remember Jesus says in Matthew 5:17, “Do not think that I have come to abolish the law or the prophets; I have come not to abolish but to fulfill.” “Love is the fulfillment of the law,” “I have come to fulfill,” which means, Jesus has come to love. Teaching the fullness of love, Jesus shares the true abundance of life. Love brings no harm to a neighbor, and there is no one Jesus harmed. He was peaceful, courageous, and his actions always based on love, even for his enemies.
That’s another aspect of Paul’s letter here, along with Psalm 119: both of them believe that God can only be good, God’s love is who God is. It’s we who are called to awareness and participation as both passages talk about “the way” or use journey language, assuming movement and dynamic growth in the involvement of the depths of love. But we tend to make this love conditional, and our contextually limited understandings become stumbling blocks. In life, we’re invited to unlearn these in order to learn deeper truths grounded in the framework of unconditional Love.
Part of this movement involves turning away from disgrace, turning in our hearts to open ourselves to God’s Presence, to receive grace as we relinquish our ego’s default desires of being separate and superior. Paul says, “Make no provision for the flesh [which is the egocentric self], to gratify its desires.” We need nothing less than a new mind: transformation through the renewing of your mind.
That gets us back to Anne Lamott, who shares that in order to grow in wisdom and the understanding of the heart, we need to unlearn much of what we’ve been taught. Part of this is external, but much of this is an inside job, which gets us back to silence and stillness and meditation and the difficulties of this process and the need for courage and patience as God enables us to not only love God, love neighbor, and love our True Self, our own soul, but to increase in capacity in doing these things.
When something in life happens and we see the end of our own efforts, that we can’t continue on our own strength, God offers conversion, a turning. When we reach our limits, and the struggles of spiritual growth seem overwhelming, God transforms us, increasing our capacity to love. In Christ, we are in God, learning to live in ways of love. You want law and order? Then live in love. Love does no harm to the neighbor. Love fulfills the law.
May we be like the Psalmist, fulfilling the law with our whole heart. May we be like Paul, knowing in the depths of our being that love is the fulfillment of the law. As Jesus leads us deeper into the depths of love, may God’s vulnerable, active love, lead us on the Way of unlearning so we, and the world, may be renewed, both Now, and forever. Amen.